Just like old times...

I went golfing yesterday afternoon for the first time in a few weeks. It really wasn't a great day to golf, as temperatures got into the upper 90s. There were a handful of other people on the course, but for the most part, it was just our group, which consisted of my longtime friend "R", his father in law "F" and "F"s buddy "B", whom I met for the first time.

"R" and I hadn't golfed together recently, but we golfed a lot together in the past. In fact, I was golfing with "R" in our teenage years, when his errant shot smashed out the windshield of a passing-by car. The old lady driving the car froze in the middle of the street (apparently in shock), but "R" owned up to his misfiring and ended up having to pay for her brand spanking new windshield. I don't know how much it cost, but I do remember "R" grumbling about having to pay for it. Back in the day, I'm sure it was enough money to affect his lifestyle for a while.

I was also golfing with him about 10 years ago, when somebody in our group (can't remember exactly who, but probably "R") hit a brand spanking new truck and put a huge ding in the front quarter panel. The driver got out of the truck and screamed at us "Who did this to my truck!!" . We told him it wasn't us - must have been the group behind us - so he took off toward their group, looking to kill somebody - and we took off looking to not be killed! I don't know whatever happened to that guy or the group behind us, but I do know we survived unscathed.

So it really shouldn't have surprised me yesterday when, while "R" and I were searching for my golf ball near the old folks home, we heard an earth-shattering "BANG!!" It sounded like a big metal hammer smashing through a stack of china dishes! Right away, we knew that somebody in our group just hit a wayward shot, and that the retirement home was not in the same condition as it was just minutes earlier. We also knew that there wasn't going to be anybody else to blame this one on, as we were the only fools willing to play on such a blistering hot day. Luckily, the only person to witness this was a resident of the home, who was sputtering at a snail's pace across the parking lot with the aid of a walker. He yelled at "R" and I "Hey, what the hell was that? What did you guys do!", to which we replied "What do you mean? We didn't hear anything - what are you talking about?" He grumbled something underneath his breath and began to make his way inside (supposedly to report us). But we weren't worried - we knew we had about twenty minutes before he'd make it inside and by then, we'd be long gone. We finished the hole and took off, never to hear from the guy again. Turns out, "B" tried to make a miraculous shot through some trees. It obviously didn't go as planned, and it ricocheted off of a pine tree and probably through the nursing home. Hopefully it didn't cause too much damage - aside from the damage on "B"s scorecard.

At the end of the round, "R" said, "Hey, we'll be playing again next week if you're interested." I don't know where we're going to end up playing, but for your guys' sake, i hope you're not going to find yourself near any golf courses that day!!